This is a continuation of Day 22.
I’m dozing on the couch, Mr. Fluffles wrapped in a hug, when John comes in. He’s quiet, gently taking his shoes off and locking the door. I hear him walk into the room behind me, his footfalls quiet on the thick carpet. His lips brush my hair as he softly whispers, “I’m sorry.”
I stretch and look up at him.
“You don’t have anything to apologize for,” I tell him, smiling.
I pat the couch next to me, sitting up.
“How was your night?” I ask, getting my heartbeat under control.
I’m nervous, afraid that this is the end, afraid that he’s finally had it with my shit.
“It was… okay,” he says, laughing humorlessly. “I wasn’t in a great mood after…”
He trails off. We’re quiet for a moment. I chew on my lip, trying to come up with the right words to say, terrified that I’ll only make it worse.
“John,” I say, “I think I’m the problem.”
“Babe, you’re not a problem. We’re just dealing with the change from your job still. We’ll adjust.”
He pulls me into his chest, squeezing. I blink back tears, relieved and apprehensive at the same time.
“I don’t know how to be happy,” I tell him, closing my eyes as hot tears spill.
He laughs, unexpected and booming in the quiet room. The suddenness startles me, the abrupt change in mood jarring.
“What?” I ask him, trying not to be offended.
“You’re just so dramatic,” he says.
“Dramatic?” I say, temper flaring.
He keeps me in his arms, chest rumbling with laughter, effectively stifling my anger.
“You were so happy when we met,” he says, kissing the top of my head. “That’s one of the reasons I fell so hard for you.”
“Really?” I ask, twisting my head up to look at him.
“Really,” he says, leaning in and kissing me.
It’s a soft kiss, tender and forgiving, full of all the emotion he feels, and in that moment I fall for him all over again. It’s a start.